just a test

for some reason the network i'm on is being stupid so this is just a test to see if i can fix it or if i need to contact google tonight

Change and Constancy

It's amazing to me how much in life changes, and how much stays the same.

Changes:
-Blogging - I used to be all about it. Trying (and failing) to write amazing posts for like the 5 people that read them. Now it doesn't do much of anything for me.
-Music - I used to listen to it non-stop. I was always looking for new bands and whatnot. Now I rarely to never look for new music, and never find the time to really put music on and listen.
-Sleeping in - last Fall semester I could sleep (granted it was aided) straight up past noon without even thinking about it (obviously life was not a good thing for me).
-Television - I would always watch TV. I had my shows and I made sure that I was on top of them.
-Arguing - I remember the days when I would argue and switch sides mid-argument, just to keep it going. It was fun for me. I rarely find myself arguing anymore.
-Soda - Whilst in Texas (and thereafter) I lived on soda. two huge 64oz drinks a day. Now I might get one occasionally.
-Life Plans - Where on earth did medical school come from? And why on earth am I actually excited to go to it?

Constants:
-Not sleeping - The only time I can fall asleep (honestly) is when I'm around my woman. Hence why I'm writing this when I have work in a few hours.
-Webcomics - I don't know if I'll ever give them up. I love them so stinking much.
-Nerdiness - I am continually getting more and more nerdy. I never thought they day would come when I would actually want to buy a comic book. But come it has...
-Cooking - I still love to cook. It makes me so happy to put stuff together and make it work.
-Talking to self/Stream-of-conscious - I still say what I'm thinking and private talking myself through life.
-Trivia - Random facts are the bomb-freaking-diggity.

I'm sure I could go on, but I don't really want to. I mean honestly, three followers? two of them the same person? Who I spend pretty much every waking hour with (now that we have no classes it's everything excluding work time)? I'm going to copy this and post it on my other blog as well. Trying to build it up. Maybe I just need to get back into the habit.

Song of the day: 'Over My Head (Cable Car)' as covered by 'A Day to Remember'

so i'm working on some new blogs at new places that i'll actually update. but i just wanted to update real fast. I'm getting married in less than 2 months...and yo gabba gabba is absolutely amazing. I want both dvds that they have out. and now that i'm going to have a niece and nephew i think it's ok to make some purchases...for them of course...anyway. i'm off to europe friday, first time leaving the continent. i feel so cool

the most random, long, boring post i may have ever written

Plans
I never know what to write here. There's all of like 5 people who read this. And a lot of those who do I already talk to everyday and they know what's going on in my life (one of them pretty much is my life). I also never know what to write about. But I'm going to write something. And it's probably going to be pretty not interesting to most people. So I would suggest not reading anymore................I love my woman. I don't know exactly when I decided that, or all the reasons why, but I really do love her. I love how she's so free willed. I love how she loves me back. I love how I can be around her and be close to her but I don't have to be all physical. I love how she takes me for who I am (all my past and all) without pushing too much on me. I love how she bounces up and down when she gets excited. I love how she didn't actually say 'yes' at first. I love how she can make sweatpants and old efy t-shirts attractive. I love how she lets me cook. I love how she likes her food dry and nevada. I love her music, I love her smile. I love how she teases me about my nerdiness. I love the way she can't get close enough. I love how smart she is. I love how distracted I make her. I love how focused she makes me. I love how she can't wait to get married. I love how she sparkles. I love how she's always cold. I love how she can turn anything into art. I love how she wants to capture all our moments so we can remember them forever. I love how she wants "pretty" things. I love how she wants to be good. I love how she'll tell me how it is. I love how she does what she wants. I love her tired mumbles. I love how she still calls me boyfriend. I love how she's invisible on campus. I love how she puts up with all my flaws. I love how I don't have to tell her that she is good and attractive and smart and spiritual. I love that I can tell her all those things anyway. I love her two eyed winks and her "closer" hugs. I love how she writes me stories. I love how she wants to be a mom. I love how her family is so great. I love how she laughs at my jokes even though they aren't funny. I love how she wants to do what's right and keeps me on track. I love so many other things, but I'm actually starting to feel tired now. And wake up time comes in 5 hours. So I'm going to skip off to be. but I. LOVE. Lissa. forever. and maybe someday I'll get to add more to this list, but I hope I'll never be able to finish it.

pointless

Sometimes I just get so dang tired and I don't know what to do. The next 3 weeks are going to be intense and crazy. They always pile everything on at the last moment, and I don't understand. The fact that I'm getting married in 78 days doesn't help at all either. I'm so excited for that. more excited than I am for the blog, which is going to go in a different direction (again). The only problem (once again) is that I don't know what that direction is exactly. We'll see though. I'm hoping that it will form into something that's freaking AMAZING. but we'll just have to see. Sometimes it's sad to look at how many people follow me on twitter, or actually do things on facebook or read my blog and realize how pathetically small that number is. But then I realize that there really isn't a reason to. So I don't feel bad. I'll switch it up somehow and start getting out there so that people will want to follow me. But we'll see. Lots of followers can be bad (look what happened to "why lds girls stay single") but I guess only time will tell.

I realized something today during my Jazz History class. My professor was telling us about some musician that we needed to remember (from the Weather Report) and he told us some stories and such and I'll remember all that, but I won't remember the person's name. I don't know if there's a name for that, but it's a problem I've always had. I can remember so many random details, things that people told me 5 years ago. I can remember eating at a restaurant in Nauvoo almost 10 years ago. I can remember tons of little things and snippets of stuff from throughout my whole life. Things that other people don't even remember.
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NOTE: RANDOM, LONG BORING PARAGRAPH ABOUT THINGS I REMEMBER FROM EARLY YEARS OF CHILDHOOD. you may want to skip it. I just talk about a few of the many, many things I remember from when I was super young. you could probably just skip it...
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I can vividly remember a toy food fight I had in preschool. We were in the basement right by the stairs, the kind that go straight down and end in a wall and you have to turn to the right to get out. Anyway, there were about 5 of us there standing by the play kitchen with the red roof (the ones that kids have) and we were chucking the plastic food at each other. And I remember one of the little girls trying to get up on the stairs and out of the way. She had on a red jumper and long, straight, super blonde hair. she was pushing the little shopping cart and ducking down. And I thought about pegging her with the fake corn-on-the-cob that I had in my hand, but then I remember thinking "she's cute, I won't hit her" and turning away, not throwing the corn at her. I also remember sitting by her the day we were in school and I tried coconut for the first time. we were in a circle in the main play room (the room with the tables was through the doorway). I remember how small the pieces were cut up. I remember hating how the milk tasted, and how dry the meat made my teeth feel, and telling Nick how much I hated it afterwards. I also remember when Nick swallowed his popcorn quarter. He was still wearing his coat (he did that a lot) and was sitting to my right (I was facing the part of the room that had the color stuff). And I thought that he was going to die or at least get really sick. He didn't look too good at all. So he got to leave early. I remember the first day in that kindergarten and how big and long the space between the van and the door seemed. I remember how my backpack felt on my back. I remember when we got a new van and my parents pulled up and we were so excited. I remember all the days with Chandler out in the sandbox. I remember when my eyes swelled shut because of hay fever. and my cousin Jared was visiting and I was embarassed because Jared and Matt always seemed cooler than me and here I was sitting on the couch in front of the TV and they come down the stairs and I've got goobers in my eye like nobody's business. And I remember my mom telling me not to scratch my eyes as we laid on her water bed late at night (it probably wasn't really that late, but it seemed like it) with a wet rag over them. I remember when my mom got super sick (bronchitus, or something like that) and when I picked out my button at the hospital when ben was born that said I was a big brother (it was on the bottom left side of the open faced stacking bins). I remember SO many random things for my childhood. I remember the first time I saw my mom wearing her glasses. I came up the stairs looking for her, and i turned left to go down the little hall to her room and there was this lady sitting on the floor with her back against the wall, just after the bathroom and right before the master bedroom entrance. She was reading a book and she looked up at me as I came around the corner and for a second I didn't know who she was. Then I did. And I remember how strange it felt to see her in glasses. I could go on and on and on for a super long time about all the things I remember (some of them I wish I could forget...).
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. IF YOU SKIPPED PICK BACK UP HERE

If I can remember so many things so vividly (and I know I'm not imagining that I'm remembering them because I remember thinking about them at other times in my life), why can't I for the life of me remember any of the things on my tests I'll have the next few weeks? I can remember irrelevant things so easily. But ask me to remember some names of people. Or dates and such and I can't hold onto. I can even think of all the stories about the people that I'm supposed to remember, but forget about their names. I guess that just shows that I'm the kind of people who remembers people and the little things about their lives and not so much the facts. But I guess that's just how things are sometimes. I also remembered why I don't really ever write in this blog...it's not very good. Oh well. I'm posting this anyway.

i got engaged

it's spring day!

So as I was getting on the computer my Internet Explorer (which I only use for Netflix instantplay and my blog) opened up to google and welcomed me in with a logo designed by Eric Carle (he writes children's books). So I moved my mouse over it to learn that today is the first day of spring. I think Marcch 20th may become one of my new favorite days... I also deleted my facebook yesterday. Nothing new there. I'll keep it down for a bit and then open it up. It's mostly just a self control thing. I am not controlled. Of course normally I'm really bad at it...but I got it this time. So much self control. Speaking of self-control, I'm going to have to exercise it something serious the next several months,cause getting married is ridic-expensive. And I'm definitely not rich. But it'll all work out. the guv'ment helped out all the people I taught on my mission, and I'd say it's time for me to get my slice. Especially if I can't find anyone to buy my summer contract. Because turns out the people in the office don't know what they're talking about. They said I could just get out of my contract, but it turns out that I can't. So I wasn't worrying about it until BAM I find out that I'm stuck. So I'm a little peeved about that. So if you know anyone looking for a place to live from June to August...I've got a sweet place for them for really low price (utilities included) and and absolutely AMAZING ward. Heck I'll even cover part of the cost.